[Speedwake]

It seems as though everytime I go out out for a cruise I see someone auditioning for "Stupid Boating Tricks".

This past Saturday afternoon I got a triple dose.

The first was leaving the marina when a guy passed me coming in who clearly could not read "NO WAKE ZONE". A few shouts from your's truly got him to slow down.

The second was the bozo who evidently had never taken a boating course and was confused about which side to pass by when coming at me "head on".

The third was the idiot in the 38' Formula who was blasting along with about 8 people on his boat and four of them sitting up on the rear engine hatch without PFD's while doing about 50 to 60 mph....

so....let's hear your stories about people you've seen auditioning the "Stupid Boating Tricks"

 

[Stuchamp]

Well, after years on the Mississippi River, I've seen way too many to tell about. But there was one that really PO'd me. We were back in a narrow slough tied up to a tree, just taking a breather.
Anyway, this real A-hole comes tearing around the bend, see's us, and aims right toward us. He turns at the last second, missing the rear of our boat by about 3 feet, sending his wake and rooster tail up over our boat and drenching us. The boat was thrown forward a few feet, but luckily no damage was done. He finally slows down and starts laughing about it and I'm ready to kill the B*st*rd ! We get untied and find him beached on a sandbar. He needs help, and then starts apologizing. Well, I forgave him with a knuckle sandwich and left him beached.


(We did go back later to make sure he got rescued)
This was the 2nd time I have had an incident similar to this.

 

[Aggressor Tom]

My own stupid boat trick, I had a Hydrostream and this canal inbetween a chain of lakes was about a hundred feet wide, but everyone went through on plane anyway. I picked a windy day to drive with a rooster tail pretty high. Needless to say the wind blew it over the oncoming boat and soaked everyone in the boat with muddy water. I never felt dumber in my boat and offered to do something to make up for it, but they were just hell bent on getting my registration numbers and burning my ass. I hurried up and took the boat back to the boat house and covered it up before the sheriff found me, and he did come lookin'.....my thought, do something stupid, admit it and offer to make up for it, if their still pissed, run like hell!

 

[OldMagicfloat]

[. Well, I forgave him with a knuckle sandwich and left him beached.

stu, good one


A couple of years ago,we were coming thru the locks with a coal barge. Boats are not allowed to tie up to barges. Well here comes this guy in a 40 ft cruiser,drunker than hell,trying to tie on to the barge. Well he 1st smashes right into the side of the barge at about 5 mph,a couple of to=imes. Then he proceeds to send his bimbo girlfriend out to try and grab the barge with their hook. All the time the lockmaster is screaming at these 2 idiots,and they just keep ramming the barge. Then he pulls up alongside,and his girlfriend jumps off the boat and right into a pile of coal,and tries to secure them to the barge. Let me tell you,no matter how good she looked in a thong,she wouldn't be gettin back in if it were my boat All this time the lockmaster will not close the locks,so for awile it was funny,then people started geting pis*ed. Me,I'm still laughing at the memory of her after she jumped into the coal pile:laugher: :laugher:

 

[Red Stripe]

Well, I forgave him with a knuckle sandwich and left him beached.

Boy, thats all you gave him :laugher: :laugher: :gunner: :dead:

 

[obnoxus]

I remember bing jealous of this guy that comes idleing to our launch ramp in a brand new Baja 36 Outlaw,,, beautiful boat,,, then I notice he is drunker then Sh&t and loose a little respect for him,,, he pal brings the trailer down, and the guy drives on pretty crooked but the 4 bunk trailer straightens him out pretty good,,, all he has to do now is goose the throttle and she'll drive right up,,,,, BUT NOOOOOO,,, thats not good enough for him,,, he backs off the trailer,,,, puts it back in forward,,,and HAMMERS the throttle ( with the steering wheels turned mind you ) the boat procieds to lift the nose go sideways, and come down on the crank mechanism putting a huge gouge in the side of the boat.....not bad for it's first outing

yes it served him right,,, but I felt so bad for the boat,,,,, To bad all it takes to drive a performance boat is money............

 

[Guest]

or you could say is all it takes to "own" a performance boat is money...

 

[Aggressor Tom]

Hell, and all I thought it took was credit

 

[Speedwake]

credit works for me!

 

[obnoxus]

I like mine,,,, It's paid for !!!!

 

[Mrs. Obnoxus]

This isn't a trick, but alot of guys think that it is.

Thanks to Mr. Obnoxus, I am the one that takes the boat on and off the trailer. He always told me that he would not boat with someone that wasn't going to learn either the boat or the trailer.

Needless to say, he wanted the boat, but "IT'S MINE"!

I love when we pull up and all of the guys that are sitting around people watching are laughing at the girl in the Baja.

So the joke is on them, because that baby gets put up on that trailer perfect everytime. Well, ok maybe not everytime, but 99.9% of the time.

 

[OldMagicfloat]

Mrs. Obnoxus
Senior Founding Member

This isn't a trick




We know!!!!!!!!!!!
It's done with smoke and mirrors.

 

[obnoxus]

No silly,,, Its the slight of hand thing,,, you know taking your attention off the obvious,,, and you wondered why she puts the boat on the trailer topless !!!

 

[OldMagicfloat]

Mrs. O'....would you please have a talk with my wife - and tell her that 28' is only 7 feet more than the 21' she had no problem with.

She's FREAKIN' OUT about trailering our new...."ship" as she calls it. Won't try it. Forcryinoutloud -- it doesn't need a tug to dock, so it's not that bad.

Fear is all in the head.

She did park the trailer last time out -- but then hailed me on the FRS 5 minutes later and said she couldn't get it straight in the spot, and told me I had to come up and do it for her.

Wait for spot, dock, tie-up, walk up, straighten, walk back.

Urggg. At least I'm gettin' exercise.

dh